This week has been a roller coaster of emotions. Up and down and backwards and forwards, never stopping. How do you try to tell and convince yourself what to feel? I'm sad. Thats what I am, and I am doing everything to make myself try and forget that I am. It's been a week, and as I sit here I can feel the heaviness of my eyes filling up with tears that I will not let out. I am happy, I have always been a happy girl.
But it is hard to stay happy when you know with all your heart that you and someone are 100% perfect for each other. That this person saw that and everything was great, and then something changed his mind. Scared him off. Ugh, when I receive the answers on how to handle this situation I guess Ill get back to this. As for now, I am tip toeing around what movies I will allow myself to watch without them causing me to become an emotional mess.
Yesterday while I was meeting with the missionaries, I was able to choose what I wanted to learn about. So the obvious choice for me was 'being of good cheer'. Since this past week has been such a downer.
There is never a real reason we shouldn't be happy. We know the savior, and we know that he is with all of us. D&C 61:36 reminds us that the Lord hasn't forsaken us, he is always here. So I just know that I need to keep this in mind, that there will always be tribulations, and that they are only but a small moment.
Now I will try and get through this day.
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